Losing a pet such as a dog or a cat is painful, but not insurmountable. Experiencing animal mourning is particularly intimate, specific to each according to his feelings, his experience, his attachment, his strength of mind. Following an accident, illness or seniority, your pet has just died and you find yourself alone, lost, stunned, with no real way out. Incomprehensible to those who do not have animals in their life, your grief may seem trivial and fleeting. Do not be ashamed to mourn your loved one and talk about it to a caring and understanding entourage. How to mourn your pet? Zoomalia hopes to provide you with psychological help to alleviate your suffering and pay tribute to your faithful companion. Through this blog post you will understand the grieving process, how to face it, the different funeral choices, everything you should or should not do to get better and reconnect with happiness. Because you were happy with him, the misfortune of having lost him should not make you forget the joy of having known him, the love shared and all the good that you have given him.
1. Go through animal mourning step by step
These phases are essential for experience animal mourning and move towards healing or appeasement of his suffering, and not forgetting:
- Shock and denial: The news of your pet’s death is like a shock wave, hard to hear, to accept, a deep wound engrained in your heart and mind that will take time to heal. Time takes time.
Anger and Guilt: In these moments, it is important to verbalize your emotions, feelings, anger, guilt or feelings of injustice. Maybe you’ll blame the vet or feel guilty? This is completely normal.
Sadness and resignation: Place the painful or joyful memories that you will flee or on the contrary you attach. This phase can last several weeks. You need to remember your pet, your daily life with him and the good times spent together (walks, games, education). Let what comes up… without grabbing hold of what goes.
Acceptance and reconstruction: Gradually, you become aware of the disappearance of your beloved companion, because your habits inevitably change to finally come to accept his death and to think peacefully about him.
A space dedicated to your pet’s memory exists on the site of 30 million friends. Paying homage to your companion can ease your grief, and so you can receive support from others who are going through the same painful situation as you are.
2. Adopting another animal: good or bad idea?
Your loved ones are already advising you to take back a pet to alleviate your despair. It starts from a good feeling, but we will never replace a domestic animal as you can change your car, apartment or job.
Some absolutely do not wish to relive the mourning of their faithful animal, and stop there. For others, it is inconceivable to continue living without a pet. Take the time to think carefully and ask the pros and cons. After all, there are so many abandoned and rescued animals in shelters just waiting for you and the warmth of a new home. Be prepared before adopting one, certainly different from the one that kept you pleasant company. It does not replace your protected fire, it will above all need your attention, your availability and your tenderness, in short, to be loved as he is.
This is why it is recommended to choose another breed, another sex, an animal with a different physique than the old one to avoid making comparisons or having the impression that it is still there. It nevertheless remains in your heart forever.
3. Take the time to mourn the animal
It depends on each person, their temperament, their strength and how they are grieving before you can move on, knowing that you will never forget your pet. Besides, you still remember your childhood dog or other crossed animals in your youth.
The sudden disappearance of an animal is similar to the loss of a loved one, a close relative, or worse, a child. You should know that some elderly people, isolated or alone on a daily basis only have their little companion as a true friend. In all cases, it is necessary talk to sensitive people who understand your pain. The attachment to an animal is indeed real, the links between you and the bond that unites you for many years cannot be erased by magic. For now, take the time you need to digest your pain.
4. Get help and be well surrounded
You can contact a doctor or psychologist to assist you if the healing process is late in coming (beyond 2 months for example). We are all unequal when it comes to the sorrows and mourning of a loved one. Think about your well-being and your loving furry friend who wouldn’t want to see you in this sad situation.
When death occurs, it is important to know what to do with the remains. To do this, it is better to anticipate the different funeral options. You have the right, for example, to recover the body (weight
The funeral cocoon respects the memory of your pet and can help you get through your suffering. Discover this innovative concept, respectful of animals and the environment, which leaves you in inheritance a place of rest and eternal contemplation. Note that it is not possible to bury your animal in the family vault, on the other hand, you can ask to keep the ashes that you can bury with you at the time of your own death. Finally, veterinarians are regularly confronted with euthanasia, the death of animals and the penalties of the masters. Discuss it with yours to make the best post-mortem decision.
5. Help other members of the household
The absence of a companion can affect other pets in the household who are not necessarily aware of death itself. They feel their master’s sadness and may show a sign of depression after grieving, which means you need to surround them more than ever and take good care of them. Considering taking another life and playmate may be beneficial for the animal that remains.
Also, you can think about adopting a young companion when yours is getting old in order to overcome the inevitable course of its loss. Thus, you can count on the other animal to comfort you and motivate you.
Giving a pet to a loved one who has just lost one is the worst possible solution. Above all, you have to understand your pain, stay tuned, empathetic, and wait to mourn.
The death of an animal is particularly difficult for a child (it is often the first time that he is confronted with a bereavement), it should not be hidden, nor go into morbid details. Opt for a animal farewell ceremony (by invoking the paradise of dogs, cats, hamsters or rabbits), a word, a candle or a children’s book which will explain concepts such as death or illness through pictures. Use a ritual to say goodbye to him, take one last walk you took with him, plant a flower or a tree, draw a picture, a letter or an offering.
6. Think about yourself and the future
The grieving process is identical to that of the loss of a loved one. For example, a puppy that you have raised and trained can live to be 20 years old and become an important part of your life. Many people cannot understand your grief, especially those who cannot love or who have never had pets in their life. If the days of mourning exist at work for the family, they are not recognized for a pet, it is a shame!
It is crucial to know recognize your state of discomfort, of depressionexpress your grief and not to internalize your pain, no matter how people look. Do not rush on another animal thinking that it will get better, it is better to mourn the animal that has left before starting the adventure with another. Do not be ashamed to cry or to reflect on his memory (tomb, stele, urn, photos). Moreover, psychologists advise to keep the photos and his necklace as a souvenir, and that’s it. In order not to rehash your grief all day long, and to accept its disappearance, it is better to get rid of your dog’s daily accessories such as the bowl, the basket, the blanket, the toys, the leash … anything that can revive painfully the loss of your companion.
remember that you are in no way responsible for the death of your animal and that no one holds it against you. In order not to maintain lasting despair, we must not go back to the past and imagine that our animal is still alive and present by our side. It is like wiggling the knife in the still open wound. Your depressive state can be longer or shorter knowing that better days await you. The positive or negative aspects in human or animal life are temporary and only move forever. You will feel better the moment you accept the death of your pet and your life is organized again without it. You will be able to cope with your animal bereavement to move away from it for good.
To keep in mind! Experiencing animal mourning is not an easy thing, it is a process of healing more or less long according to the people and the unique relationship that they shared with their protege. Don’t skip the steps to mourn your pet. To each their own pace, to each their own pain… talking about it remains the good alternative to move forward and consider adopting another pet. And as Agnès Sligh Tumbull said: The life of dogs is too short, this is really their only flaw.